What’s happening?

“...but the city of Susa was thrown into confusion.” Esther 3:15

Considering the latest reports of global antisemitic outrage, it’s not difficult to imagine the chaos that erupted back in Esther’s day. I wonder if the Persian edict of pending Jewish annihilation prompted hateful rioting ahead of time? Was anything from racism to violence against the Jews justifiable in the meantime since King Ahasuerus had already set a date that sealed their fates? Could neighbors who were once tolerant be trusted? Was it best to fight or flee? 

If faithful Jews were among those living in Susa, I picture them turning to the book of Psalms to guide their thoughts, emotions, and faith through the looming disaster. Perhaps they landed in Psalm 77. Although you may not find yourself oppressed and threatened by terror as they were - and as the Jews are today - it doesn’t take physical war to throw us into confusion.  Maybe you can relate to Asaph’s state of mind in Psalm 77:

(v.1-6) He’s crying, seeking, distressed, prayerful, inconsolable, groaning, faint-hearted, speechless, sleepless, troubled, rejected, questioning, and longing.

His gut-wrenching anxieties about God are relatable when our world, internationally or personally, turns upside-down. If we draw conclusions based on confusing circumstances, those conclusions will also be upside-down:

(v.7) Is the Lord’s rejection eternal? He’s defined by rejection; it’s what he’s done all along. 

Is His grace historical? He used to be gracious, but those days are over.

(v.8) Is His love invisible? Since I can’t see His love right now, it can’t be real.

Is His Word unreliable? What he promises isn’t strong enough to be guaranteed.

(v.9) Is his care forgetful? He must have lost track of humanity, or at least of me.

Is his intention spiteful? He’s mad at me, and, as a punishment, He withholds help.

As if Asaph has vomited up his perspective and emptied his heart of poison, the Psalm takes a turn at its mid-point:

(v.10-20) Asaph decides to remember, ponder, and meditate on God’s past activity, miraculous intervention, mighty deeds, holy ways, greatness, rescue, control over natural forces, invisible presence, and shepherding guidance. 

When we ask, “What’s happening?!”, we look back so that we can keep looking forward. 

“God led His people like a flock, by the hand of Moses and Aaron.” Psalm 77:20

Try it on Backwards

Psalm 20

The thing about a favorite T-shirt is that it hangs so familiarly that I forget I’m even wearing it. I don’t spend any part of my day actually thinking about what I have on when I pull it from my drawer. It just feels right.

But then there’s that feeling when the neckline sits up higher than usual and the shoulders pull awkwardly, that I realize I’ve put it on backwards. Suddenly, I become aware of its shape and seams that were intentionally, yet subtly, designed, and I love it even more because of those details.  Only by trying it on backwards, do I recognize why it’s so perfect front-wards.

I’ve noticed that I can treat Scripture like a favorite shirt, well-worn and comfortable, used without much attention to why it resonates.  But what if I tried Scripture on backwards? How could it accentuate truth if it were reversed into falsehood? 

Recently a friend introduced me to the idea of antipsalms, where the message of hope and truth in a Psalm is twisted into despair and lies by turning the verses to mean the opposite. 

Try on my Antipsalm 20 for Psalm 20:

There is no one to answer you in the day of trouble.

There is no one to call on for protection.

Help isn’t coming, and nor is any support.

Everything you’ve done is forgotten.

All your hopes and dreams will be dashed.

There is only crying, defeat, and failure ahead.

No one can save you; heaven is silent and too weak to rescue.

It’s better to have military strength than to rely on a god, 

because that’s where the real power is to rise above the enemy. 

The king saves himself. No one bothers with your problems.

Have you been walking around in this backwards shirt, believing it’s your reality? Quick! Twist it around, and check out Psalm 20 to get it right and to love it even more.

Psalm 19: in my own words

The Spirit of God inspired His Word in their original languages, and diligent scholars translated it into ours. Reading any text, examining it, and then rewriting it, is an exercise that uncovers, personalizes, and internalizes the meaning, but it is not to be held on equal grounds with inspiration or even translation. Based on my study of this chapter, below is my paraphrase and amplification of it.  May it breathe fresh joy into your heart.

From sunrise to sunset, the sky breaks out 

in unspoken declaration and wordless proclamation across the globe:

God is glorious, and this is His creation!

There is no language barrier or geographic limitation 

preventing this message from spreading. 

The sun rises and sets, faithfully and fully, 

touching every inch of the earth with its warmth.

The law of the LORD is completely without defect, 

restoring wholeness to our souls.

The testimony of the LORD is confirmed, 

making the naive wise.

The precepts of the LORD are level and straight, 

delighting our hearts with a perfect fit.

The commandment of the LORD is radiant, 

making our eyes glow with illumination.

The fear of the LORD is pure, 

standing the test of time.

The rules of the LORD are stable and righteous in their unity.

They satisfy our cravings more

than all the pleasures of wealth or exquisite food.

By them your servant is warned; 

by keeping them, your servant is rewarded.

Who can discern, on their own, all their mistakes?

Acquit me of hidden faults.

Hold me back from arrogant sins; 

don’t let them hold me under their power.

Then I will be blameless and acquitted of great wrongdoing.

When I open my mouth, may my words be aligned with your Word;

When I’m silent, may my thoughts embody your beautiful truth like the sky does.

In this way, I long to bring a smile to your face, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.