The Weight of Waiting
This summer, the boys and I often dropped in at our local YMCA. On the way to my trusty treadmill, I’d pass the weight-lifters and try not to stare at the contorted faces under the strain of their routine (AKA torture). Their effort was audible most of the time, so I’d quickly put my earbuds in place to drown out the sound of their exhaustion.
In reality, a little pain, sweat, and tears are to be expected at the Y. We anticipate spending energy and bearing some discomfort for the health benefits that we’ll gain in return. We know that time + resistance = strength.
What I so easily forget is that time + resistance in life builds strength too - and that resistance usually comes in the form of waiting.
Waiting is a workout for our faith, but I don’t usually wait like I’ve just entered faith’s YMCA, and I don’t willingly sign up for that membership. There’s no sign overhead alerting me to the fact that I’ve just stepped foot into a gymnasium full of opportunities and equipment that will strengthen my faith over time.
If I don’t wait like it’s a workout,
fatigue will come as a surprise.
I’ll chide myself, lose motivation, and I’ll quit.
Time gradually increases the weight and adds in more reps that won’t crush my faith; instead, time chisels it. While waiting, faith pushes back to become shapely and strong, capable of so much more than its previous limits.
If you’re waiting on God, he’s attentive and knowledgeable and deeply committed to increasing your faith’s stamina, like a personal trainer at the Y.
“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint and to him who has no might he increases strength.
Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:28-31
Approved & Pleasing
Last week, after returning from a retreat and launching a women’s Bible study at our church, an attack from the enemy came full-force into my heart:
“No one will be closer to Jesus because of those verses.”
“All you did was talk about things that don’t matter.”
“That was a waste of time.”
“If you didn’t see tears, the Word didn’t reach hearts.”
“You think there was any power behind that message?”
Etcetera. In the moment, those words landed as more valid and true than any other words.
I’m sure you’ve been there. You’ve given yourself to something God called you into, and afterward, the second-guessing, the doubts, and the lies land heavy. “What was I even thinking to imagine God could use me?”, we ask ourselves.
But there are words more valid and true that fight back like a sword:
1. “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15
We put forth effort within our callings so that we stand tested and approved by God, not by others, and not even by ourselves, so tainted by pride and vulnerable to deception. Feedback and self-evaluation have their place, but they don't determine whether God approves. Handling God’s word faithfully enables us to stand unashamed in its truth when the enemy aims darts of shame at us.
…So was I aiming for God’s approval by accurately handling His word?
2. “Without faith it is impossible to please God, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.” Hebrews 11:6
Pleasing God begins with faith, not with activity. Actions within our calling must be based on faith that God is calling! We draw nearer to God in what He’s calling us to do, because we believe that He is in it and that He rewards our step of faith.
…So was I walking by faith in what I did?
Although I did it feebly, these were the truths I had to take to heart and the questions I asked back at the lies. Whatever God has called you to today, arm yourself with words more valid and true than all other words.
A resource for devastation
I just returned from speaking at a weekend retreat at Lake Ann Camp in Michigan. A highlight for me was to hear women’s stories of what God is doing in their lives, but, most often, woven within the threads of God’s activity, is deep pain.
One of the ladies crocheted while she waited for the session to begin, and it made me think about the colors God weaves in as he knits His plan for our lives together.
The dark and the light.
The dark that makes the light pop.
The dark that recedes when it’s next to the light.
Color stands out when its opposite force is present. While seemingly working against it, the opposing color actually makes the other even more visible, purposeful, and - eventually - beautiful.
But what if God doesn’t seem to be at the light part yet in the crocheting of my life? Someone I admire for her reaction to the dark pain that came into her life, is Carol Kent. Her book When I Lay My Isaac Down, tells the story of redemption through tragedy, even though the tragedy lingers and is life-long. If you’re walking through loss, grief, and ongoing trials, When I Lay My Isaac Down might be your guide like a flashlight in the dark.
“The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” John 1:5
Why should I sing?
One of the ways that God has currently called me to serve our church is by being part of the team that leads worship. Because of that, I try to be alert to Scripture that refers to songs and music. Why do we sing? What is music’s purpose? And what if I don’t feel like singing? Won’t that make me fake?
Recently in my morning devotions, I came to Psalm 13:5,6: “But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord because He has dealt bountifully with me.”
Sometimes the dealings of the Lord with us don’t seem too bountiful. How often have I thought that I wouldn’t mind just a little more of His bounty in my life? A little more abundance? And then I could sing.
Yet, this Psalm didn’t start out from a place of overflow. In the opening, David questioned God, “how long will you forget me?…will I have sorrow in my heart all day?...how long will the enemy be exalted?” David feels forgotten, sorrowful, and victimized. Not really reasons to sing.
But.
His trust isn’t contingent upon God suddenly showing His face. His trust isn’t based on God immediately wiping away his sorrow or completely destroying his enemy. His trust is that God’s steadfast love endures when God is invisible; God’s steadfast love remains when sorrow is deep; God’s steadfast love holds him up when the enemy puts him down.
And David’s joy comes from a steady source: his salvation. Jesus pointed his disciples in that direction in Luke 10:20: “Nevertheless, do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” The source of our joy isn’t even having a good day of God working through us; rather, it’s our eternally secure salvation, rain or shine.
“But God shows His love for us
in that while we were still sinners,
Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8
“In this is love: not that we have loved God,
but that He loved us and sent His Son
to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.” 1 John 4:10
The bountiful dealings of God toward us are His steadfast love and His gift of salvation. When we believe that, then even if we wake up next Sunday morning and feel like David in verses 1-4, our song raised in praise can still be authentic.
Back-to-School Prayer
Our boys started their sophomore and senior years in high school last Wednesday, but this is their first full week back. As I’ve thought about all of their commitments and their development in 2024-2025, these desires for them rise out of Psalm 90:14-17, and this is what I pray:
Satisfied Hearts: “Satisfy Gradyn and Jace in the morning with your unfailing love…” because there is so much offered to them that will only leave them empty, longing, and unfulfilled.
Singing Mouths: “...that they may sing for joy and be glad all their days. Make them glad for as many days as you have afflicted them, for as many years as they have seen trouble…” May the hard times be displaced by the joy they find in you so that instead of overhearing teenage complaints, negativity, and sarcasm, our ears catch them singing in the shower.
Saturated Eyes: “May your deeds be shown to your servants, your splendor to Gradyn and Jace…” Our eyes roam in search of splendor. Shield their eyes with the bright light of your presence and actions, so they’re more amazed by you than by anything else.
Steadied Hands: “May the favor of the Lord our God rest on them; establish the work of their hands for them- yes, establish the work of their hands.” Only by your grace can their effort this year mean anything. Let what they do make a difference in the direction of their lives, others’ lives, and for eternity.
May it be so.